A Missing Piece of History
by jilian baade
Summary: An AU look at the Fall of Gondolin and what might have happened if Maeglin had succeeded in his plan to capture Idril.


A Missing Piece of History.

He sits by the seaside, returned to life in Valinor. Beside him sits a stunningly beautiful woman, with lovely long black hair. She looks so very much like him, that it is clear she must be closely related.

'So, Maeglin, tell me. You have spoken of your betrayal of Gondolin, of Morgoth's attack of that city and her fall, but then what? Will you tell me?

He puts down the flower he's been twirling in his fingers, 'As you wish, my dear. You of all people have the right to know, and I know why Idril has been reluctant to speak to you of this. I will tell you.'

The fair white city of Gondolin had fallen. All were dead, or fled, even the betrayer. Yet, he had survived, and against all odds he had his prize. Beautiful golden Idril, his lovely cousin.

Of course, he'd fled Gondolin, not trusting Morgoth to give him Idril once the Dark Lord had seen her beauty for himself, and frankly he suspected that Morgoth had sinister plans for himself, such as making a half Noldor orc of Royal blood.

But he'd managed to find her, his prize, his Idril, and had dragged her to his retreat, deep underground where no one would find them, laughing wildly at the success of his plan. He'd had to use her son, little Earendil, to convince her to come with him, and he'd actually found threatening the child harder than he'd imagined. Perhaps he wasn't the utter arsehole Idril had called him. He mustn't be because he'd no intention of punishing the child for biting his hand, but he was not beyond frightening Earendil a little. Not that the brave little boy frightened easily, and Maeglin had developed a grudging respect for the child's courage. Just what he ought to have expected from Idril's son.

Mind you, the boy had now been given something in his food (Maeglin sensibly had stores of food and things like clothes and bedding in his hideaway, and an underground spring nearby gave water) to make his sleep deep and dreamless. This of course was because he'd managed to get Idril to make him a promise. Yes, the sort of promise he'd dreamt of for many years: to give herself to him. Not that he really believed she loved him; he was intelligent enough to know that her fear for Earendil's safety was what was motivating her. Luckily, it was likely that Idril's horrible husband was dead.

Putting all though of Tuor from his mind, Maeglin approached Idril. She had made up a bed for her son of blankets and a warm fur rug and she knelt by his side, soothing him to sleep. A bit gruffly, he asked, 'Is he asleep?'

'Yes, Maeglin, my son sleeps, as you knew he would. He is unlikely to wake for several hours at least. Now, what do you want from me?'

'I think you know, Idril.' He said this more gently, and looked at the sleeping boy. 'He will not be harmed provided you obey me. Remember your promise.' Maeglin didn't add that he was highly unlikely to hurt the boy but he wanted Idril's compliance and obedience.

Idril blanched, all colour fading from her face, and her blue eyes went as wide as saucers. 'That's incest, Maeglin.'

He shook his head, 'not to me. My father's people don't hold to your nonsensical laws and customs. You will give yourself to me, Idril, and I in turn will be kind to you and to your son. You will want for nothing.'

She noted the gleam in his eyes as he answered her, and she shuddered, thinking to herself that he'd gone mad, but she replied defiantly 'except my freedom!'

'Except that. Still, things could be much worse, dear cousin.'

She was still, thinking, her decision finally being that if Maeglin had gone mad, she would be a fool to push him too far. So she spoke, 'very well, you can have what you want. For Earendil's sake, for his happiness and well being I shall keep my promise.'

He extended his hand to her, and drew her to a pallet of blankets he'd made up while she had been attending to little Earendil. As she took his hand, she noticed he was trembling. For an instant, her kind heart felt a pang for him, if simply holding her hand affected him so, he must really love her much more than she'd thought. Then, Idril remembered all those who had died, her father, the much-loved lords Ecthelion and Glorfindel, and possibly her husband, to name a few, although she believed Tuor to be alive. She could sense no change in her marriage bond with him, and she knew she would if he were dead. If he were alive, and well enough to do so, she knew he would seek her out. So, even had Earendil not been with her, Idril would probably have agreed to Maeglin's demands, out of fear he might harm her in his anger and madness. She was determined to stay alive and uninjured in case a chance to escape came, or Tuor found them.

'Lie down,' he whispered. Idril was astonished that when she did, he didn't fling himself upon her, but simply lay down next to her, and cuddled up to her, loosing her hair from the gold thread cap she had been wearing. He ran his fingers threw her golden hair, and buried his face in it too, breathing in the scent deeply. 'Do you know how beautiful you are, lovely Idril?'

'You know my beauty means little to me, Maeglin!' she whispered as his hands cupped her face, and then his fingers ran down her neck to the top of her bodice. 'But much to me' he replied as he undid the lace ties on the front of Idril's gown to free her breasts. She froze as his hands cupped her breasts, and then he kissed her, first lightly, then with a deeper hunger for the taste of her mouth. He broke the kiss, frowning a little, 'come, cousin, you could show a little enthusiasm for me.' He stared at her his eyes wild, his hands still caressing her breasts and she nodded. He was right, she should try to be more involved in this, it might endanger her not to. So, when his mouth met hers again, she tried to respond as Maeglin would wish.

It seemed she succeeded, for this time when Maeglin's lips left hers he was smiling. 'See Idril, this is not so hard, is it now?'

To Idril's utter shock, he was right. Betraying her husband was easier than she'd thought possible. No, she reminded herself, this was not betrayal; this was survival. Staying alive, and hoping Tuor would find her. She would be honest with Tuor, and tell him all if they were ever reunited, and she knew he wouldn't blame her, he'd just be pleased she'd managed to keep herself and their son safe using whatever means it took.

'Your mind is wandering again, cousin,' whispered Maeglin. The harsh note was back in his voice, and Idril suppressed a shudder.

'I am sorry,' she answered, 'let me help you take off your shirt, Maeglin.' He nodded, pleased, and Idril unlaced his shirt, and using both hands carefully pulled the shirt over his head, and then she brushed his hair from his face, smoothing the black strands. Maeglin was all but purring like a cat for like all elves he delighted in having his hair stroked or brushed. Idril's hands dropped to Maeglin's shoulders and rubbed his shoulders and neck. Maeglin stretched, pressing back into the welcome contact of his cousin's hands for a few minutes then he turned to her, 'that was very pleasant Idril, but it's not what I want from you.' He frowned, than smiled quite pleasantly at her, 'I think you ought to take off your dress, Idril. Yes, that's what I'd like.' He looked expectantly at her, and trying to maintain her smile, Idril did as she was told. Maeglin took a deep shuddering breath when he saw his lovely cousin naked.

'Idril!' he exclaimed. 'You are even more beautiful then I'd dreamed of.' He reached for her, and stared in appreciation at her naked body. Since Earendil's birth her body had taken on the more rounded form of motherhood, and it suited her. Maeglin reached for her, laid her down on the blankets and buried his face in her full breasts, kissing them tenderly. Against her own will Idril found her body responding to the pleasure Maeglin was giving her as he covered her in kisses while his hands roamed her body boldly.

He slipped from his breeches and Idril could feel the evidence of his arousal pressing against her as Maeglin covered her with his strong body. 'Idril, my love,' he all but moaned as he entered her body. This was what Idril had been dreading, but actually it wasn't so bad, not that she'd lie with her cousin from choice of course, or any man but her husband, but in this situation of necessity the experience wasn't as horrible as she'd expected. Maeglin appeared to be in another world as he took her, but did respond to her calling his name softly.

'Maeglin! Are you alright?'

He smiled and kissed her, 'very much, Idril, very much.' Still smiling, his eyes half closed in pleasure he continued to move within her and then suddenly, he shuddered in release. For some minutes he lay yet on her, stroking her face, and murmuring endearments. Almost suddenly he rolled off her and lay next to her, propped up on one elbow.

'Check your son, Idril.'

Surprised, she did so, and found that while Earendil slept deeply he was breathing evenly and seemed to be comfortably settled in his bed of blankets.

'He is well, Maeglin,' she answered.

'Good,' he nodded. 'Now, back over here, dear cousin. You may put your clothes on, but I want to sleep next to you.'

Idril made no protest, she'd been expecting this. Apart from anything having her sleep next to him meant Maeglin would be aware of her movements and make it difficult for her to slip away while he slept. She obediently dressed and lay down next to her cousin. As she lay in the near dark of the cave, Maeglin curled close to her, she looked at the firelight as it illuminated the cave. There was only one narrow way in or out, easily defended by a single warrior. Plenty of food, blankets, firewood and other supplies had clearly been laid in over the last years, and the fresh spring bubbled nearby. Idril might be disgusted by her cousin's betrayal and behaviour but she had to admire his planning.

Still, she might as well sleep and rest for she might need to be refreshed and strong the next day, however all the morning brought was Earendil awakening hungry, and Maeglin rather good naturedly agreeing to play games with the boy. This last quite astonished Idril, until she concluded Maeglin was probably merely trying to win Earendil's loyalty. Little will that avail him, she thought.

That night Maeglin again insisted on making sure little Earendil slept deeply, just as he insisted on lying with Idril again. She again complied for somehow certainty had come to her during the day that Tuor was alive and seeking his wife and son. So she gave Maeglin what he wanted, and resigned herself to waiting, and watching for her husband.

This pattern continued for another three days, and then Idril knew. Tuor was close, and she distracted Maeglin, talking rather loudly to him to disguise the faint sounds of someone coming towards the entrance to the cave. She trembled, praying that Maeglin wouldn't hear until too late, which fortunately he didn't.

Tuor and an elf she didn't recognise but who wore a tattered, bloody royal guard uniform burst through the entrance, surprising Maeglin, who grabbed his sword and swung it furiously at the other elf, who ducked, and parried Maeglin's blow hard, throwing him off balance. Tuor took his chance and with one thrust of his sword, ended the life of the Traitor of Gondolin. He threw down his sword even and as Maeglin's eyes dimmed he swept his wife and son into his arms. Discretely, the guard withdrew, and began to gather up some of the stored supplies to take with them.

'How did you find us?' Idril asked at last.

'Luck, and nothing else, dear wife. We saw a faint footprint in the soil above and decided to investigate this cave system. Soon, we could hear voices, yours and Maeglin's and concluded what had happened.' Tuor kissed Idril lovingly. 'Did he harm either of you?'

'No, not really. I will talk to you about it later,' she said when Earendil appeared to be paying too much attention to his parent's conversation. Tuor nodded, and started to help pack up the food into manageable sized portions to carry. Idril enlisted Earendil's aid to carry rocks, and to her husband's astonishment began to cover Maeglin's body.

'Dearest, why do you do this? He held you and our son, and by his betrayal he destroyed our city and killed most of its people. He doesn't deserve a burial.'

'Husband, he was my kinsman, and once years ago when first he came to Gondolin a decent elf. I will give him a burial, partly to remember him as he was, and partly to show that we are not blinded by revenge enough to refuse to cover his body so wild animals will not eat him. This I will do,' she said so firmly that in the end Tuor assisted her.

Finally, the guard approached, 'my lord, my lady, we ought to go. It will be growing dark outside and we should go the other survivors. It is not safe, many Orcs still roam.'

'You are right, Raegdin, of course. Come Idril, Earendil, take my hand,' answered Tuor. Idril meanwhile stared, of course it was Raegdin!

'I am sorry, Raegdin, I didn't recognise you!' Idril apologised.

'Fret not, my lady. The events of the last days have changed everyone, and I'm hardly at my best,' Raegdin tried to smile at her, but failed. 'So many died, lady, and company is small. We are planning to head down Sirion to the Sea. Maybe there we can find safety. Lord Tuor believed you and little Earendil alive, and would not leave before we had searched everywhere. It will hearten the other survivors to see you.'

Idril wondered how many had survived, but smiled grimly at Raegdin's statement that the sight of her would give hope to the others, so she shouldered her burden and followed Tuor who has already lead Earendil back above ground.

The sun was setting and the small group set as hard a pace as Earendil could manage, not slackening until they were within the circle of fires the survivors had lit. The food carried by Tuor, Idril and Raegdin was greeted with cries of joy by the people, and Idril's heart sank as she saw many were women and children. Could they get this company down to the sea and comparative safety? So few warriors were with them, and none other of the great lords. She hid in a blanket and wept for the loss of her father, and the other brave people of Gondolin.

The next day the huge task of moving the people started. Slowly, far too slowly for Tuor's peace of mind they moved. Each day however left them further from the ruins of Gondolin, and closer to safety. By mutual agreement, he did not discuss his wife's captivity by her cousin's hand; it would wait until everyone was safe and the long journey over. Idril herself dreaded this, as she had something quite unexpected to tell her husband.

So it was after many long days of travel, the small band of Gondolin's survivors found the settlement of Sirion, on the mouth of the great river, right by the Sea. There, they were greeted and sheltered by the survivors of the ruin of Doriath, the second kinslaying.

Relieved people accepted the somewhat cramped quarters that were offered them, and ate the freshly caught seafood. For the first time, Idril and Tuor had some privacy, and they sat together by a fire watching Earendil play with the other children. His mother noticed he seemed quite taken by little Elwing who also a half elven child, being Beren and Luthien's granddaughter. She idly wondered if they would wed when grown, when Tuor interrupted her thoughts.

'Idril, my love, I have been waiting for my opportunity to speak to you. I know there is something you have hidden from me, and I suspect it's to do with your days of captivity at Maeglin's hands. Did he,' and Tuor's face was stricken as he tried again to speak the words, 'did he mishandle you?'

Idril shifted uncomfortably, and finally kissed Tuor before answering him, 'not how you think, my dearest husband. I will speak the truth, hard though it will be for me to say and for you to hear. Please, listen to my words, and hear the whole tale, and remember I did what I did to prevent harm to myself or Valar forbid, our son.'

Tuor's face was grim and set now, but he nodded assent to listening quietly to his wife. Nervously, she began. 'He threatened Earendil. I had to do as I was told, I couldn't risk injury to either of us when I was sure that our marriage bond was still intact and you were alive. We might be rescued at any moment, or have a chance to escape and we needed to be able to move quickly if that chance came. So when Maeglin threatened Earendil's life if I didn't lie with him, what choice did I have?' She began to cry, 'I did not want to betray you, Tuor, truly, but he had gone mad and I dared not disobey.'

'Shh, Idril, you did what you had to. You showed courage and strength in protecting our son. The crime is Maeglin's not yours. Be easy, my wife, I am only happy you stayed alive and unharmed, and Earendil is well too.' Tuor cuddled Idril and hid his face so she couldn't see the rage in his face at learning the truth of what he suspected for he didn't want Idril thinking he in any way blamed her. He blamed himself for not being there to stop Maeglin capturing his family but in the confusion and horror of the attack it was a wonder anyone had survived much less been able to keep track on who was where.

He noticed Idril had calmed and was watching their son playing again. Earendil was bigger and stronger then the elf children of the same age, but he didn't have their grace and coordination. For all the differences, the children played happily, and then a group raced down to the water's edge and began playing a complex game involving marks in the soft sand and jumping.

Suddenly Tuor decided the children ought to be hauled away from the water before they all became encrusted in sand. Idril stopped him, 'no, let him play. He has seen too much a child ought not, and needs to just be a child again. I don't care how dirty he gets, we can wash him! Besides there is still more to tell you; I am with child again.' As Tuor started in surprise at that news, Idril finished with the biggest shock of all. 'I believe the child is Maeglin's. What in Illuvator's name should I do?'

Tuor stared in shock. 'Do? Dear wife, are you suggesting that you take herbs to miscarry the babe? Is that what you want my love?'

'No. Whatever happened, this child is innocent of any wrong doing. It may be she has an important task to perform, as we believe our son does.'

'Then it is settled. We shall raise this little one as our own, and when she is old enough we will tell her and Earendil the truth.' Idril was still distressed, and Tuor soothed her. 'As I said, if anyone has committed a crime, it is Maeglin, but this babe shall not suffer for that.'

Idril flung her arms around Tuor's neck and hugged him tightly. 'I am a lucky woman to have the best husband in the world.' Tuor said nothing, but he held his wife tightly.

Now the elf man stopped speaking, and he picked up the rose he'd been playing with earlier. 'Perhaps you should continue from here, I'd like to hear of your life.'

The woman nodded, 'that sounds fair.' She gathered her thoughts, and began to speak.

A year and a day exactly after the Fall of Gondolin, the Lady Idril gave birth to a beautiful black haired girl child. As she grew, it was obvious she was no Peredhel, but by then Idril and Tuor had explained to most people what had happened and the child was accepted by everyone as if Tuor really were her father, and so the child had called Tuor, knowing no other father. Her mother named her Magliell, and not a few people noticed that as she grew not only her name resembled that of her true father, but her face as well.

Eventually, Earendil and Elwing grew into adults and wed, and almost as soon they did Idril and Tuor announced their intention of trying to sail West. Magliell begged and pleaded to go with them, but she was forbidden due to the danger. 'You must stay with your brother,' said Tuor. 'And Elwing is with child, and will need your help with the child when it is born.' So that was Magliell's first grief, that her parents sailed away without her.

Magliell stayed by her sister in law's side when Earendil sailed and it was she who was with Elwing when her twin sons were born, Elrond and Elros, handsome dark haired boys. They were fond of their Aunt, and on the terrible day of the third Kinslaying, she obeyed Elwing's plea to try to escape with the boys. Nearly they succeeded too, but the eyes of Maglor were too sharp and he tracked them to their chosen hiding place, a deep cave system. Elrond it was who was found first, playing near the entrance, and Elros and Magliell were found soon after too. It does not tell in the history written many years later by the lore masters of Magliell, and this is because she asked Elrond to command this be so when the tales of the First Age were first written down. Nothing was recorded save that Maglor fostered the boys, yet Magliell stayed with them, and then later she stayed by Elrond, finally residing as Lady of Rivendell until he married and Lady Celebrian took that title, and her daughter Arwen after her.

The ship that carried the Ringbearers after the end of The Ring War also carried Magliell for she would stay no longer in Middle-earth if her beloved nephew would not. Secretly, she hoped to see Idril and Tuor again, and in her heart she believed Maeglin might have been returned to life and she could meet him, and discover for herself what he was like. She was curious, maybe after his capture by Morgoth he'd gone mad as her mother had said, yet even Idril said Maeglin was once a good man, if hot headed and ambitious.

The shores of Tol Eressea drew nigh before she felt nervous about the possibilities of meeting Maeglin, and to her surprise it was Glorfindel, the former Lord of the House of the Golden Flower of Gondolin who offered to escort her to Valinor proper to find her father if he had been reimbodied.

'Why, dear Glorfindel? Surely you have business of your own, friends and family of your own to find?'

'Yes I do, but they will be near to where you will be going, so I thought my company would be welcome, Magliell!'

'As it will be, I can think of no one save maybe Elrond whose company would be more welcome. I confess to a certain nervousness, which is foolish I know when I know not if Maeglin is still in the Halls of Mandos, or not!'

'It is understandable that the possibility of meeting Maeglin makes you nervous. I can think only of a handful of elves whose reputation equals his,' said Glorfindel rather tactfully. The graceful white ship they sailed on had docked now, and a woman with silver hair rushed up the gangplank, not waiting for anyone to disembark, and threw herself first into Elrond's arms, then Galadriel's and finally Magliell's. It was none other than Celebrian of course, and pleased though she was to see her husband, mother and aunt by marriage again, she was deeply upset at Arwen's decision to marry a mortal and the twins' to stay a while longer, though everyone assured her dear sons would come one day.

For several days Magliell stayed in Celebrian's home, as did Galadriel then both stated their wish to travel to the mainland of Valinor, to seek kin there. Celebrian had already told Magliell she had met Earendil, Elwing, Tuor and Idril on many occasions, and they would be waiting for her as they didn't travel to Tol Eressea. Galadriel would travel with Magliell on the ship, then their ways would part, and Magliell would travel with Glorfindel to the outskirts of Tirion where Tuor and Idril lived. Earendil had been recalled from his duties to stay with his parents and meet his sister again. Elwing too would be there, but Elrond would not go just yet as his reunion with his wife was too fresh.

The journey by ship was as brief as it was uneventful, and Magliell found her nervousness leaving at witnessing Galadriel's infectious pleasure at the thought of seeing her parents and brothers again. Once they docked, she set off alone, and on foot to seek her kin, claiming she would travel best by herself. No one gainsaid her, and she was soon lost to sight.

'Well, do we ride, or walk?' asked Magliell of Glorfindel.

'Walk for now, tonight we shall stay with some friends of mine who will loan us horses for the remainder of the journey.'

The friends turned out to be Ecthelion, Gondolin's former Lord of the Fountain, and those of his household, plus some that been of the Golden Flower. Indeed Magliell felt she was among friends, and was almost sorry to leave the following day, but the journey on horseback was pleasant. The day was well advanced when finally a white house set amongst magnificent gardens was seen in the distance, and a short way from the gate Glorfindel took his leave. 'I would not intrude on your meeting with your family, Magliell, and my own destination is near. I will however see you again soon,' and he went off, with Magliell's farewell following him.

Alone now, she felt almost nervous until a familiar figure came into the garden, sunlight gleaming in her golden hair as she bent to entice a rose bush to give up some blooms. It was Mother, thought Magliell in excitement. She galloped her horse up the path, and dismounted before the steed was fully halted, running through the gate and up the path. Like Celebrian had done, Magliell now threw herself in her mother's arms, weeping with joy. She was vaguely aware that Tuor, Earendil and Elwing were there, greeting her too, and it was Earendil who lead her to the house.

'We'd heard you were on your way, but trust you my sister to create such a scene on arriving!' he laughed.

She giggled in reply, and 'I am just so glad to see all of you! I feel I will burst with happiness.'

'And what of me?' said a voice Magliell didn't know. She discovered she was being closely looked at by a very beautiful dark haired woman.

'Now, Aunt, she will not know who you are,' laughed Idril.

'No, I do not. Who are you, lady? I feel I should know you,' said Magliell.

The strange woman stared, her face rather stern until she smiled suddenly, 'I am Aredhel.' Magliell continued to look rather confused. 'My dear, I am your grandmother.'

'You are? Of course you are,' and she hugged Aredhel happily. 'It is nice to meet you.'

'Stand back again, and let me see you,' said Aredhel. 'I could wish the circumstances of your conception and birth were different, but I cannot be but happy to have a beautiful granddaughter.'

Magliell laughed, a little nervously. 'Come on, everyone inside,' said Tuor at last. 'It is going to rain, and we will all get wet.'

Walking beside Tuor Magliell asked, 'Father, how is it you are here? You are mortal; you should have died long ago!'

'So eager to be rid of me,' teased Tuor, then at the stricken look on Magliell's face he explained, 'The Valar, in their mercy, so your mother would not be forever grieved, approached Eru and it was decreed that I would be allowed to remain among the living. Actually, like Luthien my kind was changed, and I am now judged among the Elves.'

'Oh, that's wonderful!' sighed Magliell. 'I'd heard of that in Middle-earth of course, and here, but I wasn't sure of the truth of it until I saw you for myself. Mother looks so happy, and so do you!'

'We are happy, and more so now you are returned to us,' smiled Tuor. Magliell laughed, happy to be with the man she called father again, and to see her mother, brother and sister-in-law again, and to meet her grandmother.

Dinner that night was a joyful affair, with two other elves joining the table, Idril's parents Turgon and Elenwe. Only two of Magliell's family were missing, Maeglin and his father Eol. Even had they returned to life it was highly unlikely they'd be present, but Magliell was full of curiosity about her father and grandfather. Still, she might obtain some information from her grandmother Aredhel and she vowed to approach that lady after the meal was finished.

In any events, the opportunity to speak to Aredhel privately didn't arise as Magliell's attention was taken by an old friend, who approached her, smiling. 'Raegdin, it's good to see you!' she exclaimed.

'My lady,' he was clearly delighted to see her, and kissed her hand.

Magliell threw decorum to winds and hugged the loyal guardsman who'd been a friend from when she was born until he sailed with her brother as part of his crew. Having been born in Valinor he was allowed to stay and not sent back to Middle-earth with the rest of the crew.

Highly embarrassed, he returned her hug and then scolded her for improper behaviour. 'My friend I think I know you well enough to hug you!' she laughed

'It's not that. It's that you have become a beautiful woman and', Raegdin looked a little shy, 'I was waiting for you to grow up but then I sailed with Earendil and didn't see you again. I dearly wanted to see you again, and my prayer has been granted.'

Bewildered, Magliell stared at Raegdin. 'Why? Surely a little girl such as I was then cannot have been of such interest to a grown man?'

'I was waiting for you to reach your majority to declare myself.' At that Magliell's expression became more bewildered. 'I wanted to declare my love for you, I wanted to marry you. I still do. Your eyes tell me you are unwed still.' When Magliell responded with a look of shock and also being struck speechless, Raegdin stepped away from her, a hurt look on his face.

'Am I that unappealing to you? I know I am not of royal, or even noble blood but I did not think that would matter to you.'

'It doesn't; I just never imagined that of all things you'd offer to wed me.' Magliell stared at the ground. 'I was near enough to my majority to have a woman's heart when you left, and I wept for days.'

Hope rekindled in Raegdin's eyes. 'You loved me then?' She nodded. 'Do you still?'

'I, I, yes I do. I never believed..that it was possible you felt the same. I have never experienced the smallest desire to wed anyone else.'

'Really?' Despite the relative nearness of Magliell's family Raegdin pressed a quick kiss on her forehead. 'Will you then? Marry me, I mean.' He blushed brightly, 'that's not a very romantic proposal, is it?'

'It is from your heart. My answer is yes, I would be honoured to wed you.'

Delighted, Raegdin hugged Magliell. 'I will have a proper ring for you soon. Can we tell your family now?' The poor elf looked as though he would burst with happiness if they didn't tell Magliell's family immediately.

So they did, and discovered that the only people surprised by their betrothal were themselves. For the next months the couple were all but inseparable as they waited out the 12 months of their betrothal and planned their wedding, chose the house they would live in and the hundred and one other things they needed to do.

Finally, it came down to only days before the wedding, and Magliell received a surprise visit from her grandmother Aredhel. In the months since her arrival in Valinor Magliell had come to know her grandmother well, but always the subject of Maeglin had been firmly dropped by Aredhel. This day was different; she wished to talk of him.

'My granddaughter, I have some news,' said Aredhel without preamble in her direct way. 'Your father has been returned to life, and I have no doubt but that you and he will meet soon. I've avoided talking of him to you in the past, but now we will speak. You've heard tell of what he did, of his betrayal?'

'Yes, grandmother, who hasn't? I suppose you are going to tell me you spoke to him in Mandos? And that you've come to tell me what was said.'

'Sort of.' Aredhel twiddled with her teaspoon. 'I need to tell you why I forgave him, and why your mother was partly to blame for what happened.'

'Mother! To blame! How?' exclaimed Magliell.

'By not giving your father her friendship. I know everyone talks of his 'unnatural' love for her, but remember, they first met as adults and your father did not know who this lovely woman was until he'd fallen for her. I believe that if I'd lived, I could have prevented many of the tragic events that followed, but I was dead, killed by my own husband.' Magliell stared at the intense anger on Aredhel's features. 'Luckily, Eol has refused to live again, I think because he lacks the courage and good sense to face me. Please keep this to yourself, but I thinking of petitioning the Valar to end my marriage to Eol so I may wed again.'

Mouth open in shock, Magliell could only nod in compliance. She took a big mouthful of her tea and waited to hear the rest of her grandmother's words.

'When first Maeglin came to Mandos, I refused to see the fea that was my son. I was so disgusted that he betrayed all I had held dear, and people he loved too. Then I began to think, and I remembered something I said to him once when he was a boy not quite of age. That as his mother I would always love him. Sometimes I might not like what he does, or even like him much for doing it, but I would always love him. So, I decided to see him.

I sought out my son, and was quite distressed when the normal silence of the Halls was broken by his weeping. Callously, I first in my anger assumed he wept for the failure of his plans, but I was wrong. So very wrong.' Aredhel shook her head.

'He wept from sorrow at his evil. Seeing everyone he'd loved die or be left to struggle down Sirion trying to survive, to watch the fair white city of Gondolin being destroyed had undone him completely. The last vestige of sanity had left him, and all he could do is weep. Even though the Halls are held to be timeless, I knew he wept for a long, long time. Finally, even Maeglin could weep no more, and he spoke to me for the first time. He spoke of how Mandos himself had said he was without any redeeming features, the most callous and evil elf to have ever lived. I believe he tried to defend himself on the grounds that he'd been tortured, but Mandos dismissed him. At the time I thought Mandos was very cruel to have done that, but now I think it was an attempt to shock Maeglin. It worked, but not how Mandos anticipated.

As Maeglin spoke, I realised that Idril had been very unkind to him. She had spurned all his gifts, spoken no kind words, and mocked him. She had taught her son to hate him too, and this slowly turned to great bitterness in Maeglin, and a determination to be avenged on Idril, and everyone who thought him a fool. It was while he was in this mood, in the depths of despair, that he told me was captured by Orcs who quickly deduced he was from Gondolin, and my son was taken to Angband to be questioned by Morgoth himself.

Questioning alone did not break him, it was actual torment. As a naked fea he could not hide his thoughts and mind from me, his mother. I know you have heard differently, yet I assure you he was treated most cruelly, and his fea was held to his body by Morgoth's enchantments and he could not die. So it was also that his body was healed of the wounds received quickly, so quickly and completely even for an elf that it was doubted he had been tormented, which is how the tale grew that he not been handled harshly. Even that did not break him, Magliell, you can call your father many things, but craven he was not. Eventually, Morgoth realised he would and could not break Maeglin this way, and instead worked on his mind, dredging his memories and emotions and thusly discovering his ambition to rule Gondolin and his desire to possess your mother.

Once he knew these things, it took Morgoth little time to break Maeglin in return for the promise of ruling Gondolin as one of Morgoth's thrall commanders with Idril at his side, and my son was freed to return home. He tried, he told me, to speak of his time as Morgoth's prisoner but enchantment stayed his tongue as attempted to tell his tale, mostly to Idril. He believes that if she'd listened, and tried to be kind, that he might have overcome the sorcery for long enough to speak. I don't, yet I still blame my niece. Idril knows of this now, and she too blames herself for her unkindness to Maeglin. I pray one day she can tell him this, and that he will forgive her.'

Aredhel looked up at her granddaughter, 'before you think I blame my son for nothing, I do. I blame him for his ambitions, for his folly in thinking to rule Gondolin, for his hard-headed attitudes that caused him to so far afield outside the city boundaries as to be captured. Who can blame him for falling in love?

I do also blame him for his capture and treatment of your mother after the sack of the city. I said as much, and he argued with me.'

'But Mother, she agreed to lie with me, I did not rape her. How can I have, when she survived?'

'My son, you gave her no choice. Idril feared for her son's life, what mother would refuse to lie with you or any other man under those circumstances? I would have lain with Morgoth himself to protect you,' Aredhel had replied sternly.

'I was not cruel, I did not hurt Idril. How could I have? I loved her so much! There was no need for her husband to have killed me, I should have surrendered,' he finished sulkily.

'You may have been enchanted to betray them again, and not known it. Tuor could not take the chance. As for cruelty, how do think Idril felt thinking you might hurt her beloved child? That is mental torture far worse than anything you could do to her body.'

'I did not harm her,' he repeated.

Aredhel sighed and tried a new line of reasoning. 'When Morgoth used his skills and sorcery to enter you mind, and sift your thoughts, was it accompanied by physical pain?'

'No, but it was unpleasant.'

'And did you fear more pain if you fought Morgoth's invasion of your thoughts? Did you feel violated even though you were hurt no further?'

'Yes, I did feel violated. Terribly so,' Maeglin shuddered in remembered terror and Aredhel comforted him.

'But, you had no choice but to permit this violation of your mind,' confirmed Aredhel.

'That is so.'

'Idril had similarly no choice but to permit your violation of her body, my son. Whether you hurt her or not, she had no choice, as you had no choice. Do you remember your anguish? Now picture Idril's. My son, you did rape her, as surely as if you held her down and forced her.'

Maeglin moaned, 'no, no! It was not like that.' But his eyes now held the truth realised, and again he wept again for a long time, distressed once more by his evil deeds.'

Again Aredhel halted, and looked hard at Magliell. 'Yes, I have a promise from my son to apologise to Idril if he ever has the chance. He will honour that promise, and I hope find forgiveness.

It was then that Mandos appeared, and told Maeglin that his sorrow at his actions proved Mandos' words untrue. It was now likely that Maeglin would win the right to live again if he wished it, and he should wish it. When he asked why, Mandos did something most unusual, he showed us you. A tall strong beautiful woman courageously holding Rivendell while Elrond was away at war. I was pleased and proud to see you, and I know Maeglin was too.

'Your daughter,' explained Mandos. 'Idril bore her a year after Gondolin fell.'

'How is that my cousin allowed herself to bear this child? Why did she not rid herself of the child?'

'She did not wish to, and Tuor begged her not to for the child should not be held accountable for her father's actions,' replied Mandos.

'Tuor! Tuor did that?' Maeglin thought deeply. 'He accepted my daughter and reared her as his own? Now I believe in miracles.'

Aredhel ceased speaking, and stared silently into the distance.

Finding her voice, Magliell spoke after a considerable silence. 'Why now Grandmother? Why today?'

'Because you wed in four days time, and your father will be released from the Halls on that day too. He has a great desire to attend your wedding and to wish you well.'

Magliell said nothing to that, and finally Aredhel stood and took her leave. 'Think child. He is your father, regardless of the right or wrong of your conception, he did give you life.'

'Yes Grandmother, I will think, I promise.

And she had.

'So now we know each other's tales,' said the woman, Magliell

'Indeed we do,' replied the man, who was of course Maeglin. 'Can you forgive me? Your mother has, as you know. Please Magliell, I want very much to attend your wedding, may I just be part of the crowd? I don't want to stand with your family, I just want to be there,' he begged.

'Tuor stands with me as my father,' answered Magliell. She saw Maeglin's face fall and deep disappointment and hurt show in his eyes. 'But there will be enough room for you as well.'

Laughing happily Maeglin leapt to his feet. 'Come daughter, we must hurry now, for we cannot keep Raegdin waiting any longer. He will fear you have changed your mind!' Hand in hand, the two elves descended the hill, and walked towards the waiting gathered guests.


End file.
